Learn more about non-traditional relationship styles, sexuality, and gender from a feminist, solution-focused, and mindful perspective - as well as how polyamory and LGBTQIA+ affirmative coaching can add color to your life!

I am a marriage and family therapist living in Metro Detroit during the COVID-19 pandemic, and I am frustrated. There is a dichotomy on social media, in which one group is concerned about the economy and their freedoms, and another group is concerned about their safety and saving lives. Both groups offer valid concerns, and I believe it is possible to be concerned about both of these things simultaneously. My goal in writing this article is not to start a debate. Social dista

Have you ever found yourself in a cycle of emotional overwhelm in your relationships? This could very well be due to the amount of emotional energy you’re putting into consistently pleasing the people around you. In using the term “relationships,” I’m not just pointing to the one we have with our significant other(s) – I’m talking about the relationships that exist in each area of our lives – family, friends, loved ones,  co-workers, YOURSELF, etc. These relationships can con

We all know the feeling. When we meet someone new whom we’re interested in, and we have a sudden rush of energy – emotionally, romantically, and sexually. It may feel like this person can do no wrong, and they may seem like a perfect match to you. You may want to spend as much time as you can with this new person, spend all day in bed with them, and stay up late talking to them. You often feel as though you are “high on life,” and everything you discover about this new person

What does it mean to win or lose? In most sports, there is a clear winner and a clear loser. In respect our partner(s), we also tend to think of winning or losing an argument. Many people try to win the argument themselves, because they certainly do not want to be the loser. We’ve all seen how sports teams or individuals react after a win or a loss in a game, and we do not want to be on the losing side. So, how do you win an argument with a partner? When couples are experienc

Meeting your partner’s other partner can be very stressful. It can be uncomfortable to spend time with the person whom you know is also dating your partner. For some people, meeting a metamour is a natural thing, and they aren’t phased by it. But most people may feel anxious, nervous, or even jealous as they consider meeting their metamour. They may feel as though their partner or metamour will be judging them, or feel that approval is needed from the metamour – especially if

Mindfulness is the act of being fully present in your daily life, paying attention to your five senses, and not being overly reactive to things that are happening around you [1]. You are being mindful when you actively notice the sights, scents, tastes, sounds, and sensations around you. You are also being mindful when you bring awareness to your thoughts and emotions [2]. We are all guilty of stressing out about the future, and worrying about our past. However, when we are b

Arguing with your partner is never a fun experience. However, certain arguments are worse than others. These arguments can escalate quickly, and often leave us feeling frustrated and unheard by our partners. So, how do you know when it’s time to take a break? And how do you express the fact that you need a break, in a way that your partner will understand and respect? First, it is important to recognize when an argument is not going anywhere. If you and your partner are simpl

We all have different communication styles. Over time, we fall into certain communication patterns with our partners. We may have learned our method of communication from our parents growing up, or we may feed off the communication styles that have developed throughout our relationships. Each relationship will have its own communication pattern – you most likely do not speak to your best friend in the same way that you speak to your nesting partner, and most likely do not spe

In the United States, and in most places around the world, monogamy is the default relationship style that people fall into. In romantic comedies, people often have to choose between two people to end up with “The One.”  We are raised with the idea that we have to find “The One,” and if we don’t we will end up alone at the end of our lives. Women will be crazy cat ladies, and men will be forever bachelors, still only eating take out food at age 60. This kind of stereotyping a

The Holiday Season can be incredibly stressful for anyone, and having multiple partners sometimes adds to the stress of the season. How should you split your time? What are reasonable expectations in a relationship? Is it possible to celebrate the holidays with everyone? An important thing to remember when trying to answer these questions is the fact that time is limited. In addition, something that works for one polycule may not work at all for another. For example, people i

If you are currently in a polyamorous relationship, or are thinking of entering into a polyamorous relationship, it is likely that you will have one or more metamours at some point. Your metamour is someone who is also dating your partner, but with whom you are not also romantically or sexually involved with. For example, if Tanya and Derrick are both dating Sarah, but are not dating each other, Tanya and Derrick are metamours with one another. If Tanya is also dating Liz, an

Have you ever thought about who you are attracted to? Have you been confused by your sexual orientation? Are you a mental health clinician who has had clients use new terms for sexual orientation that you have never heard before? Then this article is for you! Sexual orientation has often been thought of as a binary, with many people having the belief that you can only either be straight or gay (heterosexual or homosexual). Many people also still struggle to accept the existen

What are your beliefs about love and sex? What do you believe about relationships? How should you be treated by friends, family, and partners? How are your time management skills? What do you desire in an emotionally or physically intimate relationship? What are your relationship fears? What are your feelings about your own self-worth? What are your goals in life, and why are these your goals? Who has encouraged you to have these goals? Where did you learn your values? How do